And You Would Be…?

If the last few of these were tricky, this one especially is.

Why?

Because it specifically asks about something I just don’t do.

I know it’s common practice–even recommended at times–but, well, I made a lot of choices in my life a long time ago to not follow a number of those normal rules. By and large, that’s served me well. Especially in the case of this one.

A song that reminds you of someone you’d rather forget

See, I think it’s really, really important to remember the people in our lives. Even the ones who’ve done us wrong or hurt us.

I think doing so challenges us to figure out what kind of positive things to take away from the situation. To remember what we learned, about ourselves, other people, or the world around us. To note how far we’ve come since that moment when we wished that other never existed. To be able to tell if the pain from that experience is still holding us back… or if it’s opened up opportunities that would have otherwise been closed.

That’s not to say that you let yourself get walked all over in the name of self-knowledge. On the contrary, if you’re going out looking for problems… well, that’s a problem in and of itself and isn’t at all healthy. I’m also not saying you can’t be angry about things that happen–and especially things that are done to you. I’m just a huge advocate of accepting the past and using it to make a better future.

Looking back, I can (and have) honestly thank people who did me wrong. They all helped me become the person I am today. All the pain, all the low times, it’s all given me the chance and/or impetus to dig deeper. To figure out who I really am when I’m just me. To figure out who I am to those around me.

And remembering has allowed me to avoid repeating problematic patterns again, and again, and again.

I made a commitment to this process decades ago. And, so far, there is only a single situation that I haven’t been able to figure out something “good” that’s come out of it. Yet.

So, instead of “someone I want to forget” I guess this is more a tribute to “what I’m still trying to deal with.”

Which also means, there’s not a whole lot of story to go along with The Lumineers’ Ho Hey, because that story is still a work in progress and, until I figure out the ending, really isn’t anyone’s business but mine.

Runners Up

• She Wants Revenge, Tear You Apart –  Sometimes, songs have different meanings than just the lyrics… and sometimes those personal meanings have very little to do with the song itself. Sometimes, things just are what they are.
• Fiona Apple, Criminal – I’ve always liked this song (and Fiona Apple in general), there may or may not be more reasons for including it here.
• Godspeed You! Black Emperor, Storm – Things gather, and crescendo, and spill over. They leave an impact, but are, ultimately, ephemeral.