Don’t panic, I’m not actually going to list all 100 (or so).

Depending on how well you know me, it may seem a little odd that doing this vlog project is something that’s outside of my comfort zone.

Maybe you’ve seen me “hold court” among a group of friends or strangers, going on, at length (sometimes too much length) about any number of topics.

Maybe you’ve been at a wedding I’ve officiated.

Maybe you’ve known me long enough to have seen me on stage long, long ago in a play.

Maybe you’ve read my frank and direct (though often a bit purple) writing in my various blogs.

Being gregarious, open, and not afraid to step into the spotlight, how the heck is a vlog something I’m uncomfortable about?

Simple: I get through all that other stuff because it doesn’t leave me talking to myself.

Seriously, that’s a big part of it. Like most people, I don’t care much for how my voice sounds when it gets played back to me. As a trained public speaker, I can hear all the imperfections and hesitations and subtle stumbles. As someone who values silence as much as I do, hearing myself run on and on and on without any other voices interjecting is… disconcerting.

I’ve also questioned my own mental health enough over the years to worry just a wee bit when I find myself talking out loud and there’s no one else around. Since the current, default, vlog setup is just me, a camera, and a microphone, that’s all I’ll be doing.

I’ll also have no idea how things are being received until after they’re out there and beyond my control.

This is kind of a big deal. When I’m interacting directly with people, I can change up a lot of things based on their reactions. If the topic I’m on is falling dead, I can switch to a new one. If I’ve lost the interest of the audience, I can kick things up in my presentation, adding a little more flair. (With writing, I can always go back and edit… but mostly, I just spend a bunch of time going back over it before I put it out there, making small changes here and there… that’s really not something one can do easily with a daily vlog setup, at least not when it’s just a hobby.)

I don’t care much for looking at myself, either.

It took me a really, really long time to accept that I have, at least, an average appearance. There’s a lot that goes into that bit of personal psychology, but it is what it is. There is precisely one usable mirror in my apartment. It’s in the bathroom, over the sink. I avoid it as much as possible.

Pictures of myself? Don’t much care for most of them… no matter how good others thing they are. Seriously, you’re not going to find a flood of selfies on any of my streams. You’re not going to find dozens of profile pictures of me. I’ve been using the same two profile pictures for… a really long time. (I should probably switch to a new one before the transition will be really jarring to people… hmmm…)

While editing this vlog, I’m going to have to look at and listen to myself… a lot. That’s going to be tricky to do without getting all sorts of self-critical. (Definitely tied to the perfection paralysis I’m fighting to overcome in general with this project.)

So that’s something else I’ll need from all y’all: Perspective.

There’s a really good chance that, at some point over the next hundred days, I’ll hit a wild negative spiral or three. I’ll be frustrated that things aren’t showing up on screen like they are in my head; I’ll be fed up with how I look and sound; I’ll simply be looking for excuses to just stop.

Having other people along for the ride–people I know and trust–will help me keep all that under control better. It’s not that I want a bunch of emphatic encouragement and saccharine sweet praise. I expect honest criticism from my friends (and you do deliver oh-so-well most of the time).

The good and the bad, presented honestly, is what keeps me from flying off the road in either direction.

It also let’s me know that I’m not just talking to myself.

Speaking of talking… click the big green button below here to submit topic suggestions and questions so I’m not totally boring you to death for five minutes a day.

[jbutton size=”xxlarge” color=”green” link=”http://durosia.com/vlog-questions” newpage=”yes”]Come Ask a Question Here[/jbutton]

In attempting to keep the “plan” for this vlog thing as minimalist as possible (in order to prevent perfection paralysis on my part), I’m not really putting together an editorial calendar.

Sure, once October rolls around, I’ll likely be talking about “seasonal” things (like Halloween, ghosts, and horror films). And when we pass through November and December there will undoubtedly be some sort of “holiday” content. But, for the most part, I’m just planning on rambling on for 3-5 minutes once a day.

Like I said, nothing fancy.

Yet.

What I don’t want to do is bore you to death.

See, there’s really no reason for me to do this if no one other than my mother is going to bother watching it. (Sorry, mom.)

I work best when I’m doing things for someone else’s (potential) benefit. When there’s a chance that what I’m doing will definitely have some sort of impact (hopefully positive!) on someone’s life. It’s why I just about all of my Facebook posts are open to the world. It’s why I’ve (sporadically) maintained multiple public blogs.

Judging by past experience, the best way for me to help myself is to help (or, at least, entertain) others.

Very, very rarely do things I do solely for myself hold my attention for any length of time. Definitely not for 100 days of cranking out content.

That’s where I’m going to need your help.

Since all y’all are the ones who will be seeing these videos first (or, at least, having the option to see them… I’m not going to go all Clockwork Orange on ya…), I want it to be stuff you’re interested in.

I’ve had many conversations with many people over the years–and if you’ve bounced here from my Facebook feed, you’re probably one of those people–and accrued a lot of anecdotes and even some actual knowledge, maybe some wisdom.

This is your chance to pick my brain or challenge me to learn something new.

To help me get out of my comfort zone a little more.

To make this more than just me sitting in my apartment talking to no one. (Which I do plenty already.)

Even better: I actually want some of you directly involved.

Most of my time is spent alone these days. Often, I long for the “good ol’ days” of having a passel of people just down the hall that I can shoot the breeze with at all hours. I see this as a chance to take that idea to a new level.

Many of you do awesome things. Much more actively awesome things than I do. Things that I genuinely think lots of people out there in the world would be very interested in.

So, if there’s a topic you want to talk about–something you’re working on or something that really puts the wind in your sails–I want to sit down with you (either in person or virtually–yay! Technology!) and chat about it for a little while.

Then I want to put it out there in the world.

It may even be neat for a few of us to get together, run our own little panel discussion.

Maybe live.

I don’t know… I’m game for pretty much anything that you’re interested in.

[jbutton size=”xxlarge” color=”green” link=”http://durosia.com/vlog-questions” newpage=”yes”]Come Ask a Question Here[/jbutton]

Despite outward appearances to the contrary, the last few years really haven’t been all that great.

For a while, I’ve been more than a bit lost. Just kind of drifting about, coasting on momentum built up in years past but, really, just running on fumes. It is, in a word, unpleasant.

In a few more words: I’m not at all where I wanted to be in my life right now. In fact, due to this relatively recent lack of direction, I’m farther from where I want to be than I’ve ever been. Not much that I’ve tried has changed that at all… even less has changed it for the better. (At least in the arenas that matter most to me.)

In an effort to get out of this stagnating rut, it’s time to really get out of my comfort zone and try something else.

Those of you who know me are likely aware that my “comfort zone” is pretty wide-ranging at this point. I have dipped into many different arenas over the years. I consort with a wide variety of “freaks and weirdos” as well as more mainstream people. I can more or less fly through most social interactions with no real problem. The things I don’t do, I don’t do because they’re downright unhealthy or obviously detrimental to getting back on track to being the person I want to be. (So, no, I’m not interested in reenacting The Lost Weekend… or any part of The Hangover. And we’re definitely not talking about anything like Natural Born Killers or Falling Down.)

“But, Kier,” you may ask, “what the heck does that leave?”

Not much that I can afford, that’s for sure. (An around-the-world trip would be awesome, but that’s just not going to happen… yet…)

Part of an abandoned business plan involved something that I never really wanted to do, but would have been integral to the success of that venture. I’m dusting off that part, though certainly not the plan it was attached to. Doing this will put me right where I don’t much care to be, in a way I really don’t much care for in general.

Starting next week, and continuing for roughly the next hundred days after that, I’m going to dive head first into the world of vlogging.

That’s pretty much the extent of the plan right now. (Mainly because I know full well that if I try to plan more, I’ll just spend the next 100 days planning and not doing.)

This is where I’m going to enlist your help.

Over the next few days, I’m going to float a few ideas and ask for your feedback and suggestions. Then, when this all starts, I’m going to want need a wee bit of support in a few different ways.

I’m not expecting what I create to be fantastic right off the top (that quest for instant perfection is one of the things I’m trying to overcome). Over the course of 100 entries, though, it will (hopefully) get better. So, maybe we can celebrate that progress together. Or maybe we’ll just share in the horror of an impressive social media train wreck.

At the absolute least, it’ll be something different.

At the most, well… at the most, maybe something I throw at the wall will stick and get me back on track.

More to come…